Sometimes a song comes along that hits me right between the eyes. That’s what happened when I recently heard this one. This is actually a new song; not one of the centuries old hymns that I so love to share and keep alive. Nope. This one was written just last year; in 2020, the year of the pandemic.
This song is about truth. About telling the truth. No, it’s not about the TV and the news and the media, or any of those places where we don’t know what to believe or whom to believe anymore. This song is about me. It’s about you. It’s about our reactions and interactions with people we see every day. It’s about our response to the simple greeting, “How are you?” So often we respond with “I’m fine, yeah, I’m fine, oh, I’m fine, hey, I’m fine” when Truth Be Told, we’re not actually very fine at all.
It was, in fact, this catchy chorus that first captured my attention. These words certainly made me look at my own typical responses. For, when thinking about this, do we really want to spill ourselves to just anyone who asks how we are? In my opinion, certainly not! I think we say we’re fine mostly as a way of getting people to leave us be, or to mind their own business.
Somehow, it seems, in today’s culture, asking someone how they are is merely a standard greeting. Let’s face it, we don’t always want to know. How often are we just asking as a way of saying something, anything? And don’t we, in fact, wish others would keep their own secrets behind closed doors? Indeed, don’t we generally have enough to deal with in our own lives, without getting into the messiness of anyone else’s stuff? There can be such a fine line between these options that we‘re often not sure which direction to take. Escape or dive in?
We do this at work. We do this in the marketplace. We also do this at church, among fellow believers who care for and about us. Let’s face it, we’ve all been stabbed in the back a time or two, when we shared ourselves with someone only to find out later that they also “shared ourselves” with someone else in a way that made things worse than even we can remember.
How easily we forget that the rest of humanity, including fellow believers, are just as human as we ourselves are. We are all bound to make some sad and sorry mistakes, for “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” Jeremiah 17:9
We all hate the lies we see and hear around us, on today’s media especially, when everyone’s story about what really happened is just a bit different from the rest. Yet, are we not doing the same with our quick and hurried responses of, “I’m fine, yeah, I’m fine, oh, I’m fine, hey, I’m fine” when, Truth Be Told, we’re not?
God calls us as believers to love and care for one another. My pastor reminds us regularly that our definition of love should be “living for the good of someone else.” This is a noble, though not particularly easy calling. We are called to care about and love one another, even when we would rather hide and keep to ourselves and not want to be bothered. “By this all men know that you are my disciples: if you have love for one another.” John 13:35
Matthew West says he wrote this song because he was tired of being a ‘professional’ Christian and knew it was time to be authentic. How easily we cover-up and pretend things are fine. It’s time we dare to believe that God loves us even when we mess up. Time to be honest and dare to believe there are others who love us anyway, even when they know we are less than perfect.
I recently watched the faith-based movie, Hidden Secrets, that tries to picture what this can look like. Basically, the majority of the characters in the movie had hidden sin-secrets for which they had sought and received forgiveness from God. Still, there was a lot of fear and hiding from those who loudly judged various sins. Being a movie, it all came out in the end, so to speak, and they were all able to not only confront and forgive one another but continue to be friends and love one another in spite of the humanity displayed. I thought this was an excellent picture of loving and caring for one another as believers since we are all human and prone to blowing it at some point.
Perhaps we, as believers, can learn, by God’s grace and direction. Learn to respond without judgement while displaying the higher purpose of loving one another. This is not because we are perfect and therefore won’t blow it, for we know that isn’t the case. Rather, it’s because we are redeemed that we can love one another in such a way that the world will know we are His disciples.
May we also learn to respond to those “How are you?” questions by being genuine and honest enough to be able to sincerely say; “Well actually, I could use prayer,” or “I’m struggling today, thanks for asking.”
May God fill us with His wisdom and strength to demonstrate His love by living for the good of others.
Truth Be Told By Matthew West with Andrew Pruis (2020)
Lie number one: You’re supposed to have it all together
And when they ask how you’re doin’, just smile and tell them, “Never better”
Lie number two: Everybody’s life is perfect except yours
So keep your messes and your wounds and your secrets safe with you behind closed doors
CHORUS: But truth be told
The truth is rarely told, no…
I say, “I’m fine, yeah, I’m fine, oh, I’m fine, hey, I’m fine”
But I’m not, I’m broken
And when it’s out of control I say it’s under control
But it’s not and You know it
I don’t know why it’s so hard to admit it
When bein’ honest is the only way to fix it
There’s no failure, no fall
There’s no sin You don’t already know
So let the truth be told
There’s a sign on the door, says, “Come as you are” but I doubt it
‘Cause if we lived like that was true, every Sunday mornin’ pew would be crowded
But didn’t You say church should look more like a hospital?
A safe place for the sick, the sinner and the scarred, and the prodigals, like me
Can I really stand here unashamed
Knowin’ that Your love for me won’t change?
Oh God, if that’s really true
Then let the truth be told